Strolling Along

Isn't it crazy to think that I was at work last Monday morning???!!  What seven little days can bring.  Wow, if you ever needed a reminder to cherish every moment of what you think is the "the same ol' routine" or the exhaustion of "keeping up with it all" - I am your poster child!!!  What I wouldn't give tonight to walk downstairs and tuck my babies (big ones now!) in bed and then fall asleep next to my husband. But I am also painfully aware that there are so many others just like us who have had their worlds turned upside down in the blink of an eye.  You just gotta keep moving forward.

I am on Day 4 of chemo.  Three more to go.  Still holding up well.  We walked the halls three times and I cranked out another 25 mins on the treadmill.  Still at that blistering 1.5 mph pace.  Never too early to start training for that post treatment survivor race that I will be walking or running (thanks for the inspirational suggestion!)

My highlight today was a visit from a great friend from back home who was kind enough to drive thru Carrollton to deliver Odoodledoos donuts.  Great medicine and the nurses really enjoyed the leftovers!!  They want to know where they can find them in Richmond....sorry.....gotta head east to find 'em.

This hospitalization has been very interesting with the explosion of technology in the last six years.  Then I basically had the blog, email, and phone calls.  Now there is facebook and texting and Skype.  My daughter has got me "snapchatting" with her which is a blast.  People are inviting me to play games on line - note, I am not good!  Next to me I am watching my mom learn to navigate my IPad (painful!!) while I am either on my smartphone or the laptop.  It is very cool to have all of the connections.  I am sure my world will close in very soon and my communication will be less.  But for now technology and you all have really expanded these four walls. So thanks!!

Sunday Praises

I have so much to be thankful for as we close out a Sunday evening.  For one thing as you can see - I still have my hair!! Ha ha.  I have completed two full days of chemo and there have been very little effects so far.  They say it will be worst after the chemo ends on Day 7, and that Day 14 is the typical bottom, and then another 14 days of trying to recover after that.  I am only on Day 3 so I will worry about that when I get there.

We have had some expected and surprise visitors this weekend.  It was nice to see my mother-in-law on Saturday and so nice of Brant's cousins to drive her up here.  A friend from Blacksburg sent her mother who lives in Richmond on a shopping trip to see if she could find some clothes that will work in the hospital.  She has never even met me but shows up as my own personal shopper with a bag of stuff to try out.  So nice!!!  My sister drove up today after church to surprise me and we have had a fun day of visiting.  She brought goodies from the drugstore, decor to spiff up the room and some tennis shoes.  I am banking all these days of feeling good and hopeful in the memory vault for withdrawal in future days.

Mom and I are settling into some routines around here.  She corrects me if I say anything negative.  She's like a positivity app - you say something negative and she translates it into a positive statement.  Kind of aggravating at times, but helpful.  We also are walking the floor as much as possible.  I apparently set a patient record by logging a 1-1/2 miles yesterday.  Today with my tennis shoes delivered, I hopped on the treadmill and logged 20 minutes at a speedy 1.5 mph pace.  The Pandora tunes were upbeat and I found some good lyrics in Christina Aguilera's Fighter.  Definitely got some endorphins going and I made good use of the blood transfusion they gave me this morning.

Thanks to everyone who has overwhelmingly poured out love, support, prayers, and offers to help.  Brant and I feel so blessed and thankful.  The road ahead will be tough but you all have had so many words of encouragement and scripture verses to keep us strong.  I leave you with a favorite right now:

Phlippians 4:6-7 - Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Jesus Christ.

P.S - A friend suggested I add the link on the right side of my blog.  I'm not sure if I did it right, but I think you can sign up so you get an email when I make a new post.

Friday Afternoon Happy Hour: Two-for-One Chemo Cocktails

It has been a great day today. I wish I could bottle it up and just sail thru chemo feeling like this each day. I was finally moved from the 10th floor of the North Hospital to the 2nd floor of the Critical Care Hospital. There was some sort of issue going on between the two groups but Brant finally just put his foot down and said I needed to be where my medical team of doctors was located. I was very impressed with how quickly and professionally they handled the situation after that. The new digs are pretty awesome. Huge room with a big window, fold out sofa, exercise room on the floor (hey - maybe I will have time to hit the gym, lol). Brant could not believe what he had been missing out on the last two days. But it was time for him to head up to Blacksburg, so my mom will get to enjoy it instead. Mom & Dad arrived around noon and we had the "hand-off". I will miss Brant and really enjoyed our two days together to get this process started. I didn't think he could improve on how well he did last time I was sick, but he kicked up his game a few more notches!!

I also had my first visitors today - two VDOT-ers. They brought some encouraging notes from all my co-workers - thanks so much!! They also brought a beautiful VDOT-orange flower plant.  But due to infection prevention he was banished to the window ledge out in the hallway.  I think he will be happy with a few other plants that have been quarantined there as well.  And he has a great view of the I-95 merge operation to keep him busy.  The staff isn't too crazy about living things around this place, but I will try to keep an eye on him as I walk around the floor and hope he will be with me in a month when it is time to go home.

I got a steroid and a unit of packed red blood cells today I am feeling good and have nowhere to go...  so I am going to make this a long post for anyone interested in the medical side of things and how the heck I wound back up in chemo!! You have been warned.

My blood counts have been slowly dropping -who knows for how long? I noticed it when out of the blue I was very fatigued about two weeks ago. I couldn't bounce up the stairs like normal at work and the hills on the walk Brant and I usually take suddenly wiped me out of breath. I thought maybe it was from a stomach bug I had gotten a few days earlier, but after a few more days of getting steadily more tired, I suspected otherwise. I went to the dr. for a check-up and asked for blood work to be done. From that appt I wound up in the ER on Wed and again on Thurs last week with low blood counts. With no obvious (ER type stuff) causing the low counts, they sent me home with a referral the next day with the local oncologist (I no longer had one of those....and my old one was back in Norfolk). The oncologist did the bone marrow biopsy last Friday, called Monday with preliminary results to say it didn't loook good, and then said I needed to pick my cancer treatment center. I said VCU sounded good and was pretty close to both home in Blacksburg and family in Hampton Roads, so that is how I got here...

The diagnosis they have given me is Acute Myeloid Leukemia (AML).  There are many different variations and subtypes of AML.  Once they have all of the cytogenetic testing done on my bone marrow, they will be able to tell more specifically what my disease is all about.  But basically my leukemia means that defective cells called Blasts are growing in my bone marrow and crowding out the healthy cells that make hematopoietic (meaning blood related) stem cells. Those good stem cells are released into the blood stream and grow into red cells (needed to carry oxygen to your muscles, low RBCs = fatigue), white cells (fight infection, low WBCs = high risk of infection), and platelets (needed for clotting, low Plats = bruising or bleeding). Did you know that a healthy person makes billions of new blood cells EVERY DAY??!! Talk about a serious production... The more the bad blast cells that grow, the less the healthy cells can get made.   I have probably been trending down for some period of time, but hit the point where I started to notice.  And I have been trending even further down in the last two weeks. 

So the standard treatment plan is first to go thru Induction Chemotherapy.  This is a week long regimen targeted at killing all of the blast cells in your bone marrow.  As usual with chemo, it is an equal opportunity killer and takes out lots of good stuff in the process.  It damages but doesn't kill off the good marrow cells and you spend the next three to four weeks in the hospital coaxing those guys to come back out and start working.  Of course, you gets lots of RBC and platlet transfusions to keep you going until your bone marrow kicks back in.

Assuming I have a good response to Induction Chemo, they would recommend I move to a stem cell transplant from a matched donor.  That is another whole process and I'm not even going there yet because I am focused on step one!!  But it is very similar to the procedure I did six years ago except that time I used my own stem cells.

So there you have it.  They say I got leukemia because of all the cancer treatments I received 5-7 years ago beating my Hodgkins.  So the game plan is to give me a lot more chemo?!?!  Makes perfect sense, right?  Well, as absurd as it may sound, I am praying this regimen will work.  We were considering entering into a clinical trial testing out a new drug therapy (FLAM) against the standard protocol (named 7+3).  But we found out today that we would have to wait until Monday for more pathology results to see if I could enter the study.  Given how fast my counts have been dropping, we decided to just get started with 7+3.  It is a randomized trial, so I would have had a 50% chance that I would have been placed in the standard treatment group of the trial anyway.  Didn't seem like good odds..... So as of 4:50 this afternoon they pushed my first of three daily doses of idarubicin, and then started my 7 day drip of cytarabine.  Not exactly the Friday afternoon cocktail I would like to be enjoying, but I am so happy to get started and just pray that these drugs will get in there and do what they are supposed to do!

I'm not sleepy but better get to bed....

Long but Pleasant Day

We are closing in on our second night here at Massey Cancer Center. I know Brant is really looking forward to another night on that recliner....not!! We are fortunate to have a room at the Hospitality House where my "caregiver" can get a shower and stretch out on a bed sometimes for some rest. Of course, I am worried that no one will ever use it. Tonight is Brant's last night in Richmond and then he will head back to Blacksburg to be with the kids. I know they need him more than I do, but I will miss having him around. Mom will arrive tomorrow to take over watching me here at the hospital. Not a bad substitution....

I had platelets early this morning before getting ready to have my Hickman catheter installed. I had a bit of a reaction to them and starting shaking uncontrollably. No, Robin, I did not have any homemade brownies. But a dose of Benedryl and things were fine...and I was passed out. Before the Benadryl had time to wear off, they wheeled me down for the procedure where I got even more very pleasant drugs. Let's just say I rested with a smile most of the morning.

In the afternoon I cleared my heart test and we are now just waiting on my bone marrow pathology report before starting chemo. Hopefully I will start chemo tomorrow since I don't want to give the Leukemia any more time. I find that this go around I really don't want to search the internet and be an expert. I understand it well enough and know there are some poor prognostic data out there. But so much of it is for elderly people (which my office mates probably think I am, but I am not) and it doesn't apply to me. I met the attending doctor today and she is very good and very positive. I am just focusing on starting chemo and listening to their advice for now. This is a very good cancer center.

I did manage to take a few walks around the halls today. I had to laugh when I got to the end of the hall on the 10th floor and found myself peering out on a gorgeous day overlooking the Central Offices for VDOT. The hours pass so slowly, work would be fun. But my career for now is beating cancer.

Good night.

We Have Arrived

It was quite a day. We said our good-byes to the kids as they left for school and then Brant and I left for Richmond. I am so proud of them for choosing to keep their normal routines going. I am thankful for the friends and teachers that embraced them today and gave them lots of love. I know it will be tough for them...much harder than last time when they were really too young to understand.

We got to Richmond a little late due to roadwork....guess I can't complain about my employer, lol, but it was aggravating!! My mom and dad were here waiting, demanding a hug before travelling on to the Burg to watch the kids. Nothing beats a hug from Mom and hearing you Dad say he will fly you to Germany if needed.

Everyone has been very friendly here and worked to get me admitted into a room on short notice. I should be awarded an honorary PhD for the disertation I gave (and repeated and repeated and repeated) to the parade of med students, residents, fellows, and doctors....not to mention a few nurses and lab folks. There wasn't much left for Dracula after they got all my bloodwork. The biggest bummer of the day, though, was having to get another bone marrow biopsy. Two in less than a week just seems unfair!! But this was my first one with medication. Very nice stuff. It was kind of like going thru natural child birth for three kids and then doing the fourth with an epidural. Duh - why didn't I do that before??!! Oh yeah, it was never offered since all others have been done in a Dr.'s office and not in a hopsital setting.

Thank you for blowing up my email, facebook and phone with all the support and encouragement. You guys sure think I can beat this and that is what I was needing to hear today. God answered my prayers and I am definitely feeling more hopeful. The overall path ahead of me still seems daunting and impossible, but the first step in front of me - Induction Chemotherapy - seems manageable and I will focus on that. I can do all things thru God who gives me strength!!!

Good Night for now. I am scheduled to get my central line first thing in the morning. It will be nice to ditch the IV in my arm!

Here we go again....

I was really hoping that this Blog was permanently retired, but we just got hit by a Mack Truck this week and found out I have Acute Myeloid Leukemia. It is likely a result of the chemo that I underwent to beat Hodgkins. We are still very much in shock and are asking for prayers. I am struggling right now to find that positive outlook that I know is so important. I am struggling to hand this over to God and to be at peace that He will see us through. I am struggling with how to help the kids - they are so awesome. I know Brant has his own challenges he is facing so say some special prayers for him, too. I couldn't ask for a better partner, friend, rock to have by my side. Tomorrow we head to MCV's Cancer Center in Richmond with hopes of getting admitted. The plan is to start Phase 1 of chemo which be about a month hopsital stay. I think once I get there and get settled I will be ready to get at it. I have always responded well to chemo in past treatments and am hopeful this one will be the same. Chris says I am "2 for 2" with cancer, the defending champ, and must keep hold of my title.